A Stronger Woman.

I always want to be stronger. I am a strong person, and I know and believe that. It's so important that I am able to take care of myself, and to be able to do it with a smile on my face. I want to be happy, always, even through the toughest, most trying times. I know God is on my side, and how can I fail if I have Him?


XOXO,
Tracy

This weekend was a ton of fun!

I kicked off the weekend by going hiking with Shannon! It kicked my butt.. but it's something I want to keep doing, it was a lot of fun and a new way to exercise!! Then I worked all night, which was nothing special but at least I made some money!!

On Saturday we got up at the buttcrack of dawn and headed to the beach :) Me, Samie, Shannon and Rickie were there all day with some other awesome people joining us later in the day. We had such a great time just relaxing at the beach, and boogey-boarding & playing volley-ball, roasting hot dogs and chillin by the fire.. it was a perfect day at the beach!! :)


On Sunday I went riding with Brett and his friend Jarrett. It was a lot of fun watching my awesome boyfriend ride!! He's so great. It was HOT in the sun, but we still had lots of fun..


So needless to say, I'm pooped now after a great weekend in the sun.


Time to rest up for the next weekend.. River time!!! :)

Hello, July.

Hi everyone. I hope this post finds you all well. I'm just posting to remind myself of some things I guess. :)


These last few days I have been upset about things, and I don't know why. My heart hurt and I was just plain sad. I'm not even about to be PMSing, so it was bugging me a lot that I would be so upset over NOTHING at all. Unfortunately, I took it out on one of the people who loves me the most in my life, Brett. We fought and we fought and eventually worked it out. But I guess that's not the point of this blog.


I'm writing this to remind myself how strong I am. That I can make myself happy. Not alone, of course. My friends and my family make me the strong woman that I am today, and I'm not ready to lose that. I'm not ready to rely on other people to make me happy. I think that's probably why I started to get upset these last few days. Because no one was going out of their way to make ME happy. Hell, what makes me that special? I got to get out there and make it for myself. Life is good, I am an amazing woman, and I never, EVER want to forget that. :)

Surprise..

Me & Brett are talking again. I won't tell details on here, it's personal. But we're talking again, and taking things very slow.. it's going smoothly so far. it's hard for both of us to take it slowly.. but i'm standing firm in that.


i'm working at baskin robbins again.. lame, i know. but i needed money and something to do with all my spare time.

life is good. :)


k bye

A Difference..

I'm not going to say I'm feeling better, because I'm not. But for some reason, starting yesterday, I feel some sort of relief from all this heartbreak stuff. I'm going to miss him forever. I loved him with my whole heart, and that being taken away won't be an easy thing to get over. I'm prepared to deal with that. But I'm also determined to do whatever it takes to begin to feel better. I'm looking at all the good things in my life. I'm trusting in God, that this is all in his plan for me, and as much as I don't like it personally, He is working in my life. <3



I loved you Brett Browne, with all my heart, and I always will.
Xoxo.



Goodbye.

Answers...

I feel like I'm not healing. Sometimes I think I'm doing better, but then I just realize that I'm not. I know it's over between us. I know that. But I don't understand WHY. What happened? We were so happy, I KNOW we were happy.. Nothing was wrong until that sad day.. I don't know why he didn't want to work things out.. Why he actually wanted this.. Why he wanted me OUT of his life.. I don't understand how he can be totally fine and not heartbroken and falling apart like I am. Does he miss me? Does he think of me like I think of him? I know it shouldn't matter, but it crosses my mind. I'm so ready to let go, but I feel like I can't, because I just don't GET it. I really don't. And I don't think I ever will.


I miss him. I miss US. With my whole heart. :(


xoxo

I wish

I could work out all the time. It keeps my mind off of everything that's going on. I think I feel a bad addiction coming on. But hey- I paid $100 for a membership for the summer, why not use it to my advantage?! YAY for getting in shape like I've wanted too forever.. now I just have to avoid seeing that one guy there..