Feels like...

Good morning! I don't have much time to write, but I just wanted to let my readers know that it is COLD in Flagstaff today. The first really really cold day we have had. The weather people said it is about 20-something outside, but feels like 17! Wow. Now I have to go brave this coooold weather!! Wish me luck!!

One Terrible Feeling...

is jealously. I hate being jealous. I know being jealous is not a good thing, but I honestly can't help it. When I look at them, when I see how happy they are together, I get jealous. Because that is exactly what I wanted. And I thought that we could have had that. I don't know why it's so hard for him to give me what he gives her. They make each other truly happy, and you can see that plain and simple. Maybe I was doing something wrong, but all I ever wanted to do was to make him as happy as he obviously makes her. They enjoy spending time together, it's not looked at like a bad thing, no one thinks that she is stealing him away from his friends.. I just don't get it. I wanted that so bad. I'm so jealous.

I know, I know. This is exactly why I have to let go.. because there IS some guy out there who will make me feel like she feels, and there is a guy out there who I can make the happiest he has ever been, like he is with her..


I guess it's all part of life, it's all part of growing up..

After a while

you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul

and you learn love doesn't mean leaning and company doesn't always mean security.

And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't always promises

and you begin to accept your defeats with your head up and and your eyes ahead

with the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child.

And you learn to build all your roads on today

because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans and futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.

After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much

So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers

And you learn that you really can endure, that you really are strong and you really do have worth and you learn and you learn with every good-bye you learn.

After a while

you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul

and you learn love doesn't mean leaning and company doesn't always mean security.

And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't always promises

and you begin to accept your defeats with your head up and and your eyes ahead

with the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child.

And you learn to build all your roads on today

because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans and futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.

After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much

So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers

And you learn that you really can endure, that you really are strong and you really do have worth and you learn and you learn with every good-bye you learn.

Hi There.

It's been a while since I posted, it seems like that's always what I say. I should be better about updating this- although who knows if anyone reads it!

Life is good, like always.
Roommate drama, well with one roommate. Chances are you already know about it. I'm not gonna go into detail on the web because that's immature haha. But yeah..

SCHOOL is crazy. I'm working super hard and am taking way too many units but that's nothing new.. i'm soo ready to be out of school already!!

let's see what else..
boys = stressful.

family= amazing, they were up here last weekend and we had so much fun going to the football game and we made a trip to the grand canyon, plus it was just so nice to see them, since i don't get to see them nearly enough! but i'm headed home in a few weekends and i'm SUPER excited about that :) although my dad won't be there :( i won't get to see him until thanksgiving! wayy too far away :( i miss him!!

i miss a lottt of people actually. my friends and my family for the most part.. i feel like i'm drifting away from everyone! i have been trying super hard to keep in touch with them better...


hmm that's all. i should get back to studying for my exercise physiology exam now..


goodbye my loves!!