Why

are boys so stupid :( how come he can't just GET how i feel. like honestly. yeah maybe i'm being stupid and overreacting to NOTHING but it still should matter that i'm upset. honestly. i hope things get better, i really really do.. because i am so so so in love with him but sometimes i look at him and i just wonder why he is still with me. not to say that he doesn't love me.. but i just.. i don't think i really matter much. just like.. it's almost christmas.. and no i don't really want a present from him.. but when i think about him saying that its because "he doesn't have any money right now".. and then he tells me about how he just bought like 3 new shirts AND a new sweatshirt.. i guess it just makes me feel kind of sad. and how he doesn't know what he's going to do on new years.. how it will just be a "last minute thing".. that wouldn't bother me if we weren't together.. but i'm his girlfriend.. why doesn't he want to spend that with me? and after this weekend.. him looking like he had NO fun at all when he hung out with me and my family and friends like.. i could never ask him to come with me.. i dunno. maybe i just expect to much. but he IS my boyfriend.. :( i dunno. it just sucks because i love him sooo much. like i LOVE this guy and i just want things to go back to how they were.. when he was totally crazy about me. :( blahhhh. ok..


i probably shouldn't be writing a blog about this.. because its no ones business and i should keep it to myself, and i love him and i don't want to lose him.. but yeah.. anyways..